Strrrrrrretch...

"Um. Hi."

"Have you ever stretched?"

"YOU HAVEN'T? Omigosh, it's THE BEST!"

"I can't wait to show you!"

"CHECK IT OUT!"

"SEE? Isn't it GREAT?! Stretching is THE BEST thing, and it never--"

"...Gah...!"

"Um, okay. Occasionally, in some cases, it can lead to pooping. Just a little.
Hey, on an unrelated matter: You wouldn't have any Handi-Wipes, uh, handy? Wouldja?"